Journal #8: Chapter 8

What is the definition of ‘good’ and ‘evil’? Can the words ‘just’ and ‘unjust’ be existed in Auschwitz?

I was so shocked when I read that there was the Market where the workers trade items like shirts and portions of bread. The Market even had tobacco. From the previous chapters, my perception of the workers in Auschwitz was that they were tired of living in Auschwitz. I thought they wouldn’t bother to be active except when they eat, work and sleep. However, they actively traded their shirts for little pieces of bread. Of course, trading was forbidden by the SS men, but following the regulation, which is a part of being good, was not a big deal to the workers.

As I read this chapter, I wondered if morality can exist in an extremely depressing place such as Auschwitz. I doubt it. I think there would no concept of being moral or immoral in Auschwitz. More specifically, I think the people would not be even attempted to bother to think about morality. They are physically and mentally exhausted and do not find joy in Auschwitz. Why would they care about being righteous? Most of us care about being ‘good’ because we have comfortable life. We don’t have to worry about our basic needs such as what we are going to eat tomorrow. But for the men in Auschwitz, surviving is the main hardship. How they live tomorrow is not important to them; whether they’ll live or not is important. Therefore, the words such as good, evil, or moral would not mean the same as they do to us. I think the concepts would be all ignored and forgotten in Auschwitz because being ‘good’ wouldn’t help the people to survive there.

Memorable Quotes:
“Here scores of prisoners driven desperate by hunger prowl around, with lips half-open and eyes gleaming, lured by a deceptive instinct to where the merchandise shown makes the gnawing of their stomachs more acute and their salvation more assiduous” (78).

“For us, on the contrary, the Lager is not a punishment; for us, no end is foreseen and the Lager is nothing but a manner of living assigned to us, without limits of time, in the bosom of the Germanic social organism” (83).

“We now invite the reader to contemplate the possible meaning in the Lager of the words ‘good’ and ‘evil,’ ‘just’ and ‘unjust’; let everybody judge, on the basis of the picture we have outlined and of the examples given above, how much of our ordinary moral world could survive on this side of the barbed wire” (86).

Journal #7: Chapter 7

Hope is an essential element in life that brings joy and happiness. Without hope, the life would be very miserable and gloomy. Hope has miraculous power. It makes people feel better and go through hardships. It enables people to imagine and to expect better life. Moreover, hope sometimes gives people extra strength and makes difficult situations easier.

What would be like to live without hope? Would people have desire to live one more day? For me, if I no longer have hope in my life, I would be devastated. I would not see any purpose of living. If I can’t expect bright days in my life, how and why would I enjoy the present?

Primo Levi had to go through hopeless time in Auschwitz. Auschwitz is such a hopeless place. Even Primo Levi himself wrote, “… everything is grey around us, and we are grey” (71). The color grey has negative connotation. It implies being gloomy, depressing and hopeless. Therefore, I can infer that Auschwitz was a very depressing place and a lot of men did not have hope of future. There was no life in Auschwitz.

In such a miserable situation, the slightest improvement can trigger hope. For example, when the weather became warmer one day, the workers rejoiced. It was a small change in temperature, but it meant one less enemy to the workers. The work, which used to be really hard, seemed even easier after the weather change. Furthermore, I think the workers feel new hope of surviving in Auschwitz.

However, hope may be turned into too much desire when we hope for something badly. Then the beauty of hope is gone. Human desire is endless and it is not easily stoppable. Primo Levi wrote “… one hears it said that man is never content” (73). People are never satisfied. Theye desire one thing but once they get it, they usually want another thing. I think it is important to have balance between hope and desire in order to live a content life. We should never lose hope but we should never have too much desire, either.

Memorable Quotes:
“The Buna is not: the Buna is desperately and essentially opaque and grey. This huge entanglement of iron, concrete, mud and smoke is the negation of beauty … and the only things alive are machines and slaves – and the former are more alive than the latter” (72).

“We are the salves of the salves, whom all can give orders to, and our name is the number which we carry tattooed on our arm and sewn on our jacket” (72).

“The Lager is hunger: we ourselves are hunger, living hunger” (74).

“If there is one thing sure I this world it is certainly this: that it will not happen to us a second time” (74).

Journal #6: Chapter 6

I agreed with Primo Levi when he wrote that lunch time was almost like a heaven since the work in Auschwitz was terrible. When I worked in the Philippines and in Thailand for Habitat for Humanity, I loved the break time, too. Although I should not even attempt to compare my work in the Habitat for Humanity to Primo Levi’s work (since his situations were absolutely devastating), I could imagine what would have been like to have break time during the hard work.

I think Resnyk was a very good companion. From my experience of working with different people, I know that it is a real advantage to have good partner(s) when working in pairs or in groups. Primo Levi wrote, “[Resnyk] lifts up the sleeper by himself and rests it on my right shoulder with care…” (67) and I thought it was really nice of Resnyk :)

Memorable Quotes:
“The latrine is an oasis of peace” (68).

“Like a rapid, voracious cancer, it kills our sleep and oppresses us with a foreboding anguish…” (70).

Journal #5: Chapter 5

Alberto, Primo Levi’s best friend, was an intelligent, friendly and righteous man. Even in Auschwitz, he remained to be uncorrupted. He fought for his own life, but at the same time, according to Primo Levi, Alberto was everybody’s friend.

Is being everybody’s friend possible? I used to think that it is possible. But now I don’t think so. Honestly, I used to want to be like Alberto. I wanted to be always nice to everybody and I hoped everyone would like me, too. So I tried to become that kind of person for a while. However, I soon realized that it is impossible to accomplish. The more I tried to become “perfect” among people, the more I wasn’t sure of myself. I mean, it is really hard to always smile and be nice to others when I don’t feel well and when others do not agree with me.

So, I finally decided that I could no longer pretend to be Ms. Perfect. I can’t pretend to be someone who is not me. If my words and actions are not from my sincere heart, they are meaningless and useless. I shouldn’t worry about how others would think of me. The more important thing is how I feel about myself and how God thinks of me. When building relationships with others, now I think the most important thing is to understand God’s will. I believe that I first need to be honest with myself and with God in order to have true relationships with others.

“Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will” (Romans 12:2).

Memorable Quote:
“He fights for his life but still remains everybody’s friend. He ‘knows’ whom to corrupt, whom to avoid, whose compassion to arouse, whom to resist. Yet he himself did not become corrupt. I always saw, and still see in him, the rare figure of the strong yet peace-loving man against whom the weapons of night are blunted” (57).

Journal #4: Chapter 4

Primo Levi wrote that everything was hostile in the camp. The SS men were of course mean and cruel but other prisoners were also hostile and evil. I could notice the evilness of people by reading the parts where people did not answer others’ questions and made fun of others. Primo Levi said the social structure of the camp is based on the human law that the privileged oppress the unprivileged. I think it is a part of human nature than people with power want to control others who seemed to be inferior. There is plenty of evidence supporting the statement. For example, colonization and slavery show inequality among people and abuse of power. Also at present, some politicians and leaders in countries take advantage of power and make life of poor people even more difficult. Many people think that we should treat everyone equally, but in real life, the inevitable human law does exist.

Primo Levi wrote, “We have never seen its boundaries, but we feel all around us the evil presence of the barbed wire that separates us from the world” (42). There was this invisible wall that separated the men in Auschwitz from the rest of the world. Repeating the manual work everyday and being monitored by enemy all the time, the men would have suffocated with lack of freedom. So, even though he was surrounded by hundreds of people, Primo Levi would have felt loneliness and a sense of isolation. I think all men feel a sense of isolation to some extent in their lives. We may live among others and have interactions with them, we often find ourselves alone and isolated. But at the same time, we grow internally when we deal with the loneliness inside us. I think feeling a sense of isolation is not the problem, but how to deal with it is what matters!

Memorable Quotes:
“We have never seen its boundaries, but we feel all around us the evil presence of the barbed wire that separates us from the world” (42).

“This fills me with anger, although I already know that it is in the normal order of things that the privileged oppress the unprivileged: the social structure of the camp is based on this human law” (44).

Journal #3: Chapter 3

“But this was the sense, not forgotten either then or later: that precisely because the Lager was a great machine to reduce us to beasts, we must not become beasts; that even in this place one can survive, and therefore one must want to survive, to tell the story, to bear witness; and that to survive we must force ourselves to save at least the skeleton, the scaffolding, the form of civilization. We are slaves, deprived of every right, exposed to every insult, condemned to certain death, but we still possess one power, and we must defend it with all our strength for it is the last – the power to refuse our consent. So we must certainly wash our faces without soap in dirty water and dry ourselves on our jackets. We must polish our shoes, not because the regulation states it, but for dignity and propriety. We must walk erect, without dragging our feet, not in homage to Prussian discipline but to remain alive, not to begin to die” (41).

This the message from Steinlauf, “a man of good will.” In Auschwitz, he washed his face everyday even without soap. Primo Levi thought washing oneself was a waste of energy but Steinlauf did not let the bad circumstances get him.

I love the message in the above passage. I like it because it states that we must be righteous all the time. It teaches us that men should be able to stand for what they believe. They should not lose their moral beliefs because of the circumstances. The passage criticizes people who just follow the trend of crowd. We often do something because that is what majority of people does. For example, we often think that throwing a candy wrapper on street is okay because many people do so. Not many people actually dare to pick it up. But the passage tells us that it is morally wrong to surrender to surroundings. I believe that we should not allow our surroundings and situations to overcome us. We should be able to keep our virtue even under harsh condition, like in Auschwitz.

I also used to be a person who easily obeys to people around me or to my surroundings. For instance, I used to obediently follow the decision of my friends because I wanted to be part of the group. However, I started to change at some point. I am no longer the person who just follows the crowd. Nowadays, if I think that something is wrong to do, then I don’t do it. I may not be firm enough yet to persuade people not to do it, but I do not follow the crowd. And I’m usually happy with my decision. I think it is important for people to stand for what they believe. Like Steinlauf in the chapter said, we should do our work and duty not because the rule or others tell us to do, but for dignity and virtue.

Journal #2: Chapter 2

In chapter 2, I felt that the men who arrived in the Buna were in fact no longer men. They’ve lost all of their possessions, values and purpose in life. The SS men took away their clothes, shoes and even their names. On page 27, Primo Levi wrote, “They will even take away our name: and if we want to keep it, we will have to find ourselves the strength to do so, to manage somehow so that behind the name something of us, of us as were, still remains.” We often think that name is simply what we call each other. However, name contains deeper meanings. A name of a person can tell us what kind of person he/she is. It indicates the person’s personality and belief. When we hear someone’s name, we can associate the name with certain impression of that person. I think we are responsible for our names. We should try to behave well, so we would be able to create positive impression when others hear our names.

Since name represents who we are, taking our names away is very dangerous. Without the name, we may lose our identity. I think this is what had happened to the men in the Buna. They’ve lost their name, their identity. Their new identity was the number (such as 174517) which meant nothing more than a worker in the Buna. Maintaining their names and their identity would have been really hard for the men in Auschwitz due to the circumstances. The SS men completely manipulated the men. Even the presence of SS men exhausted men and made them feel useless. In this situation, I think the men were very vulnerable and likely to forget their identity. Primo Levi wrote, “He who loses all often easily loses himself” (27).

I think many people “lose themselves” nowadays, too. But the causes are not the same ones that Primo Levi encountered. Today, the causes of losing oneself may be interactions with different people, peer pressure, influence of society. For example, many teenage girls want to be thin because the world tells them that skinny girls are beautiful. Instead of focusing on who they are truly, they pay more attention to their physical body. As a result, many of them feel insecure and do not know their identity. I think among the living people, many of them are not truly living. They all breathe, eat and sleep but they unsure of their identity. I wonder if they know who they are. When others hear their names, what kind of impressions would their names convey?

Memorable Quotes:
“Arbeit Marcht Frei, work gives freedom” (22).

“There is nowhere to look in a mirror, but our appearance stands in front of us, reflected in a hundred livid faces, in a hundred miserable and sordid puppets. We are transformed into the phantoms glimpsed yesterday evening” (26).

“… he will be a hollow man, reduced to suffering and needs, forgetful of dignity and restraint, for he who loses all often easily loses himself” (27).

“For months and years, the problem of the remote future has grown pale to them and has lost all intensity in face of the far more urgent and concrete problems of the near future: how much one will eat today, if it will snow, if there will be coal to unload” (36).

“But men are rarely logical when their own fate is at stake” (36).

“It was better not to think” (37).